Freddy Fazbear's Fun-Castle
by ThePainedPikachu
Summary: I decide to work at Freddy Fazbear's Fun-Castle, because I am stupid. (WARNING: THIS IS MEANT AS A PARODY. DO NOT TAKE SERIOUSLY)
1. Prologue

Freddy Fazbear's fun-castle: Prologue

My name is Charles Plumblethorpe.

I work at Freddy Fazbear's fun-castle. It is the worst job in the world, and I don't know why people still go there, let alone enjoy going there. I work here because I am a complete manchild with no friends. Why? Well, I am a collector. A collector of the esteemed Pop!-Vinyl figurines. These expensive, plastic Knick-Knacks are my life. I also like anime. Like it so much, in fact, that I filled my car to the brim with figures, plushies and pillows to the point where my car had become an Otakumobile™.

You could say, at 27, my life is a wreck.

So one day, I was perusing the Internet, and was about to buy my Grown-self some children's toys, when, I realised I was poor and needed money. So naturally, I spent my last $2 on a newspaper and went to look at the Job listings. Unfortunately for me, nearly all the listings had this: "No men-children please. We need real people."

This was discrimination. It was a crime against my people. But I needed a job, so I stopped giving a damn. Luckily for me, there was one job which accepted me:

"FREDDY FAZBEAR'S FUN-CASTLE

HELP WANTED.

PLEASE COME AND LOOK AFTER OUR KILLER EVIL DEATHROBOTS.

ANYONE CAN BE HIRED, AS YOU WILL PROBABLY DIE HORRIBLY.

YOU WILL GET $120 DOLLARS."

It looked perfect. I jumped into my Otakumobile ™ and drove there to ask about the job.


	2. Chapter 1: Freddy Fatbear

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Felt generous, here's an early update, with a handy dandy schedule:**_

_**Monday: Maybe an update**_

_**Tuesday: Maybe an update**_

_**Wednesday: Maybe an update**_

_**Etc.**_

I drove up, and walked in.

Well, I got the job, Hooray for me. But I heard them saying "we'll be doing the world a favour", or something like that. It was nothing to worry about, though.

~DAWN OF THE FIRST NIGHT~

I arrived at the pizzeria. The place was rundown, and ramshackle. The gates were rusted, and the windows grimy. The last few employees, the Janitors, were coming out as I went in. As I walked past, I saw the animatronics. I don't know why, but I could have sworn one of them said something. "He…He…" Were they talking about Hetalia? I LOVED THAT ANIME. But I didn't have time to think about anime, not now. I had a duty to perform. It was 11:40, giving me time to prepare for the animatronic scare party due to begin in 20 minutes. I decided to bring my 3DS and Pokémon with me for entertainment. Also, anticipating being spooked, I brought an entire pack of patented Adult Diapers.

There was a guy on the phone, to tell me what to do so my chance of dying a horrible grisly death would be at least 5% lower. He said something like: "Hello, Hello? Welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Fun-Castle. I worked in that office before you, and am finishing my last week now, so I hope there's no cliché 'this character dies because they're doing well' moments, ha-ha. Anyway, Check those cameras close those doors, and don't die, I *cough cough* don't *cough cough* believe in you!"

~LATER~

Freddy didn't move. I'm not surprised. He weighs what, 3000 pounds? Although I could have SWORN he looked at me. I ignored it, and kept playing Pokémon. As I was fighting May, I heard a moaning noise. It was the Chicken. She was holding Pizza. There was NO WAY I was going to be tempted by delicious free pizza. Besides, I already took a whole box. But, after she left those moans kept happening. Guess what?

The bunny was right at the door. I nearly soiled my collector's edition Superman™ pants. Oh wait, I did. DAMN YOU …uh what was his name again? Billy? Was it Bertrude? No, maybe it was Bangalangadingdong? Oh wait, I remember, his name was Bonnie the bunny. What kind of a name even IS that, anyway?

After that, it was 4:20 AM. I had to resist the urge to make a weed joke. I nearly failed. Then the phone guy called again: "Someone already did that. They're dead now." That convinced me not to do what I was about to do with my phone and portable speaker.

I kept the doors closed after that.

It was 6 AM, and I was at 69% power. I did pretty well, even If I do say so myself. What was strange, however, was the fact that all the animatronics had turned themselves off. It was very intriguing. I went home to eat ramen and cry.


End file.
